Phenomenon: Colors Splatter
Phenomenon section is lively again you guys, finally.
This piece is a bit special to me simply because it has been published by ABWAB magazine, in their latest issue which was just out.
I hope you like it, its real and from my heart to you.
Heavy bodies. Thats what you see when you hit any spot in the country.
Do not be tricked by the phrase ” Heavy Bodies ” for I am not talking about kilo grams, I am talking about how heavy souls are.
I remember when I went to Starbucks the other day with a big smile on my face due to some great news I heard over the phone. A woman was waiting for her order, I could tell she was in “haste” mode. The feet were tapping, the dis-comfort of waiting, watch gazing and finally, the inevitable ” why is this taking so long ? ” she screamed.
I continued smiling, minding my business. I always pass by this branch so I know the employees. We had our usual quick chat. We tend not to discuss my order since they know it very well so we talk about how work/family/vacation/plans are, then end up with a funny statement and burst out laughing.
The nervous lady did not like this, did not like this at all. She decided to come my way, slowly, yet surely and said ” What are you talking about ? are you talking about me ? do you think im funny ? never saw a broken heel before? ” so I greeted her first, then asked her what is she referring to ? Then she lifted her legs a bit, her heels, one of her heels was broken and she thought we were talking about that. I think she saw how astonished I was with her assumptions, so she, all by herself apologized and backed off.
In my book, I think she had a “colors splatter” moment.
What im trying to say can not be understood unless you start your Imagination engine. So here’s the thing:
Your skin’s color is black, night black. Imagine if someone threw a comment about you, a comment you think is disrespectful, that comment has a color too, lets say its blue. Now imagine that word/description, being thrown your way till it slaps your body. What do you get ? A mixture of black and blue, yes ? Imagine if more comments came your way with all sorts of colors, what would you be ? A mess. A heavy mess.
Now lets flip it.
What if you were transparent ? What if everything people threw at you can pass through you without leaving a mark ? just like air.
Want to be that ? you can. You can be that flow of air, that transparent body with zero drama and false assumptions.
How?
Simple, do not react. I could have easily reacted to that lady with the same kind of vibe she was giving me. I didnt and you shouldent.
Dont take things personally. Slow down. remind yourself that your a drop of water, not just in the ocean, but in this galaxy which is only, again, a drop, in an ocean of galaxies from a long line of trillion others. How little are you now ? very tiny ? Tell me, by doing that, did you kill your ego ? not exactly, but your getting there.
Thats how I live.
Venting is not how humans should go about doing things, I dont let myself get upset to reach venting.
Remember this, and I say this fully aware, my dear, nothing, i repeat, nothing is worth attention but yourself. I say that with meanings of love and respect underneath, neglecting ignorance and arrogance.
Morning practice:
Try to wake up imagining that your skin has an extra layer on it. A layer of feathers, beautiful yet not yours, not your skin. Imagine that this layer represents being lazy, a pessimist, ignorant, envious, rude and hateful.
Now get in the shower, reach out to all sides of your body imagining you’re cleaning yourself out of it. Pass by your arms, legs, back, hair and stomach. Imagine the water on top of you is washing it all away, down the drain, away from you and your thoughts. Paving the way for the goodness inside you to come out, for you to focus on yourself and the power you have within, how you can use that great energy to move, motivate and squeeze out the best from your surroundings.
Please remind yourself how beautiful from the inside you are after this experience. Smile, embrace the morning gifts, starting with your health, well being, breakfast and family.
Well, you did clean up, clear your mind, paved the way for whats good, and believe it or not, you kind of exercised before even saying hi to anyone yet.
I hope the peace of this moment stays with you till the rest of this day/eveining.
Related posts:
Life here would be so much easier if everyone does exactly what you suggested, especially the drama part
Nice post
Thinker, Thank you
This is one of the greates things I have ever read, and I will definately be re-reading it again. Thank u so much for such an amazing post. UPLIFTING !
7aneen, im super glad you found what you could relate to through the post.
If you were uplifted, then my job is done here
even though im reading this right before bed, i know ill be sleeping peacefully tonight thinking about your positive words and dusting off the black and blues.
hope you all have a transparent day(:
thank you poach, your wisdom is uplifting!
ABM, your kindness is uplifting, I hope you have a great morning the day after.
Few are those who will see right through the words.
Blessings.
One word , marvelous !!
Eissa, super glad you liked it, more power to you
It is a great post Abdullah… I consider myself a very positive person in general and I can take what I get most of the time. I think I got it from my dad’s side of the family… bas ma artha a7ad yedous 3ala 6arafi to the degree of disrespect.
What do you do in a situation where you are outright insulted?
Hey there Dalal, Glad you found this post interesting, Its great that you consider yourself an optimist.
What do I do if I was insulted ?
It depends on the situation ofcourse. Yet the most crucial thing is not to take things personally.
In my opinion, if a stranger throws a word or a hint at you, to me, in my book, it does not mean a thing. Simply because they dont know you, what your made of, yes ?
It might hurt if its from someone close to you. But then again, it might be a mental pattern that goes with the same questions/attitude/behavior, think of mums to be specific, yes ?
Abdullah, most of us were brought up to assume the best of people and respect them. You joke with the employees of Starbucks, not only because you are a regular and they know you as a customer, but you also have respect for them. You are being you Right?
However, there are those who consider these employees were put there only to serve them, they don’t know the words “Excuse me, Please and Thank You”. It doesn’t exist in their book. If that lady who yelled, “Why is this taking so long!” and then turned her frustrations and insecurity on me because of a broken heel, and because I was joking and laughing with the employees, I’d bite her in the *** and unleash my berserker side on her, and give her a piece of my mind, because the world doesn’t revolve around her! And she has to learn respect if she wasn’t brought up right.
Because Strangers don’t know you, they have no right to be disrespectful, or throw words or hints, even if you don’t take it personally. You didn’t do anything to give them cause, so why all the insolence? Why don’t people change their attitude and outlook in life? Why the arrogance and vanity? Why don’t they grant you the same consideration you give them? Why should it only be you, or me, and why don’t we take it personally? (Well I do)
I’m smiling as I’m typing this and thinking positive thoughts, and I hope I’m making sense
Dalal, trust me, I know exactly what you mean.
You have the right to throw things back and treat them just like they did. yes ?
However, we can complain all day long on/about how people behave towards us and expats in the country BUT it would not change a thing. You and I know best, being locals and all.
The idea is not to TELL them to change by giving back the same pressure/words/reaction they assume would happen from your side. The idea is to MAKE them change by simply being inspired.
Make them know that in reality, in social/economic/class levels, you are literally ahead, still the idea is not to crash them down, I know you can, yet, set an example by being grounded, loving, understanding, open and compassionate. A slave.
They might be inspired. I know that many readers who went through these kinds of posts I put up as “Phenomenon” are inspired a great deal.
Why should you go this far out ? Look at the same lady who went crazy at first, gradually became human and tender again. She even apologized.
Nothing in this temporary phase is worth it. Please keep that in mind.
Will do cheri… will do
so basically as the saying goes….
“Take it easy ya 3azeezy”
hehehe makes me laugh whenever i say it
Hey there Dalal, thanks for dropping by.
Actually. its a bit beyond that. You’ll slowly get there
Abdullah, most of us were brought up to assume the best of people and respect them. You joke with the employees of Starbucks, not only because you are a regular and they know you as a customer, but you also have respect for them. You are being you Right?
However, there are those who consider these employees were put there only to serve them, they don’t know the words “Excuse me, Please and Thank You”. It doesn’t exist in their book. If that lady who yelled, “Why is this taking so long!” and then turned her frustrations and insecurity on me because of a broken heel, and because I was joking and laughing with the employees, I’d bite her in the *** and unleash my berserker side on her, and give her a piece of my mind, because the world doesn’t revolve around her! And she has to learn respect if she wasn’t brought up right.
Because Strangers don’t know you, they have no right to be disrespectful, or throw words or hints, even if you don’t take it personally. You didn’t do anything to give them cause, so why all the insolence? Why don’t people change their attitude and outlook in life? Why the arrogance and vanity? Why don’t they grant you the same consideration you give them? Why should it only be you, or me, and why don’t we take it personally? (Well I do)
I’m smiling as I’m typing this and thinking positive thoughts.
1. i wish i could finally finish my psychology paper instead of reading your blog, but here’s the thing, i cant stop reading your blog
2. i think that woman is simply paranoid
3. i loved every inch of that post! and it honestly made my smile
Nora,
A blessing to have you here, yet school rules over anything else. Ignore p0ach for the moment and focus on whats important.
That woman, I guess, was pressured, just my 2 cents ?
I am beyond happy you found it interesting, an honor.
THANK YOU !
I tried my best to refrain myself from commenting this week to “study”
but this post is just too awesome for words!
It is by far one of the wisest ones I have ever read in the bloggers’ world!
I absolutely loved it and I hope that people actually learn from the moral behind the post..
and that includes people who are rude from the beginning.. the people who think that everything revolves around them should just stop and think before making dramatic scenes for nothing!
Personally, I don’t react to such situations but they do bother me a lot…
You post gave me a lot to think about.. and it did definitely shine.. thank you
Shushu, I am beyond happy with your response/reaction to tis post.
I am super glad you “choose” not to react to madness. Trust that its not them whos doing what they’r doing, they’r just identified with their EGO.
You can easily see through them.
An honor to have my readers pleased and entertained.
Thank you
it’s a bit hard to not react vey fast i think it needs practice .
i can’t blame here a broken heel is indeed a disaster
Rania, your absolutely right on the practice part.
Here’s a tip. Start your practice in the street while driving. People will be rude, cross you out, act insanely UN-human, try not to judge them. Think of them as people who are “Awake”
Trust me, if you recorded how they drove off, showed it to’em, they’ll be embarrassed.
Thank you!!
Thank you for dropping by
I (HUG) this post. ;*
on shafafiyya, ilnas ili yistaqbiloon alwan tit7athaf 3alaihum.. kanaw youm min il ayam (i.e. birth) shaffafeen.. ilfarg ina ma 3rifaw y7af`6oon 3alaiha min 5ilal tan`6eefha o talmee3ha 3ala 6ool.
Self love ihya hal shafafiya.
F A point taken.
yet try to separate Self Love from self obsession. Yes ?
indeed totally different things. one comes from healthy self esteem and love, whereas, the other from unhealthy self esteem and fear. MORE PPL SHOULD UNDERSTAND THIS DISTINGTION, their lives would be easier. which i think is increasingly happening. Enjoy! ;**
Thank you for nice blog and opportunity to broaden my wies.
I like this quota from Stephen R. Covey:
“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space lies our freedom and power to choose our response. In those choices lie our growth and our happiness.”
https://www.stephencovey.com/
UmAbdulrahman, Thank you for dropping by
I know that you understand the whole concept simply because you typed in that quote.
Your soul is amazing. Thank you !
hey tara i’ll stop commenting if u dont reply to me! ee tahdeed. ma y3atbik illa illi….
WALLAH inee radait
not enuf.. try harder
;*
I can’t La La! I can’t do what your saying. Your so calm! I might easily take her other heel off and make her hold it in her hands and say “Hatha ya bil 7alij Ya bil Ryool”?! As Rqaya told Sbeecha in her wedding day! I don’t want her apology, but i will not stand there with a SMILE! I can’t! (7amagt)!
I think that this is the best post I’ve read by far, including all blogs. It’s hard to pick since all your posts kick ass, and take that from me, I never sugar coat things
Nora, thank you for dropping by, your kindness and nice comment.
Im super happy you found this interesting.
Thank you !
1 of my fav. posts =D
very smart way of handling the situation…
if i was in her shoes i would’ve frankly thought the same way (that you and the employees were laughing at me) but instead of going up to you and saying the things she said, I would’ve smiled fast and left feeling embarrassed coz of my heel. And try to forget about it. But deep down it hurts.
“you’re a drop of water” <— il keep that in mind
Loved it *thumbs up*
But what if that lady was a huge , buff man and he Talked to you in the same attitude as that lady. Let’s say you ignored him ,and BAM he smacks you right in the face . What will you do ?
Btw, you’re so inspirational.