As a student of fine literature, I have been very much interested in the formation of sentences.
I guess thats why they think im a good listener. I take lots of pauses while people talk. HAH !
Seriously though, there is this famous senentces we use in the country, heavily, like ” Respect yourself ” A.K.A ” e7terim nafsik “.
Something in me said that this whole line is wrong, here’s why I think so:
1- In all holly religions, the “SELF” is referred to as the bad side of you. Its not you. Its the being in you, the being that is known to be wicked, wild, sining, thirsty for appreciation. In the Qura’an we have a verse that says ” Al nafs al lawama “, in which there are types of this “Nafs” or “Self”.
2- Since it is clear now that the “Self” is not the next best thing in this whole wide world, we understand that it needs to be disciplined. Yes ?
3- Finally, we must realize that when we say ” Respect yourself, i7term nafseik “ it means we are dropping a joke or not really comprehending the right structure of words yet.
Conclusion:
The right senetnce to be used here is ” Discipline yourself, self discipline, or Adiib Nafsik”, now THAT sounds right to me.
Get it ?
(UPDATE)
Regarding the Nafs. more reasons why I firmly believe that it needs to be controlled and disciplined:
- ” Al-Nafs Amara bil soo’e” Prophet Mohammed, PBUH. Which means its not you, its yourself.
- There is a verse in QURAN that says something along those lines which means, if you commit a sin then its on your(Self). If you make good deeds, then its for IT <- it refers to the self. NOT you, but your self.
The QURA’AN is an encyclopedia of “Self” references, im sure your aware of that. yet, not once, the self was presented as a good deed doer. Check other Holy books too (Based on what your religion is, Bible/Torah)
- Tell me something, (this is based on faith), In ramadan, when your fasting, the devil and his gang are tied to the ground and we know that he is the root of all evil yes ?, tell me, how come we still sin ? who made us do that ?
- If your aware enough of the thought process that goes into your brain, you hear a voice in you, judging you, judging others, has negative things to reflect on you, if you sensed it, thats is not you, but yourself. Silence it immediately, its not what you want to hear.
- When somebody advices you they say ” gi3day intay bainich o bain nafsich o fakray “
who’s you and who’s yourself ? ever thought of that ?
Oh and about consciousness, it always comes later right ? why ?. Why cant I stop the whole thing from the beginning and not sin to not feel guilty later ?
Answer: Because “most” people are taken over by their own selves. They need to monitor their thought process and “CATCH” that feeling of anger, regret, fear, when you do, all your life will change.
I hope I clarified my self a bit. no ?
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atwaqa3 qasdhom ena e7trem nafek 3ashan ye7tarmonik ..
hmmmm .. bs jumletek made more sense!
“e7terem nafsik” iljumla eb 7ad that’ha mo mo7tarama
Awafiq 3ala your point, it makes lots of sense ina lama tingaal ma ra7 itkoon mo7tarama
why i don’t wanna discipline my wild and wicked self!! it is there to be so!!.. i think we can keep the verb respect, but we substitute “self” with others
“respect others” is the right correction, but the interesting play of words makes it stronger from the side of the angry man to say respect “yourself” than saying “respect me!”
it is more like a counter attack..
what do you think of that?
Deema, you have a very valid point, and yes it depends on how you throw it at others.
Sometimes the simple word “yes” could be very offensive depending on the situation.
I agree with Deema
what about “ista7 3ala wayhik”?
i demand an explanation
Mis7in, my lovely teacher/mentor
ok, ista7 3ala wayhik, referes back to the original phrase ” ista7 3ala ma boga min may wayhik ” then they made it shorter.
If I remember correctly, “Maaay il wayeh” refers to si7t il wayeh o 3afyetah lama itroo7 minik o itkkon hal 7ala ib two options:
- when your scared (back then, daddy would follow you with khayzarana/&-or 3igaal for the most stupid reason ever)
- When your shy.
So when they say it, it means/asks/demands of you to be in that state of shock when you’v committed something nasty.
are we there yet ?
Thanks… doesn’t ‘maay ilwayh’ refer to someone’s dignity?
and if someone told me ista7 3ala way….
okaaaaaaaaaaaaay…. now I got it…
just had a moment of clarity… a light shines on me now… I can finally put insomnia behind me.
And for that I thank you
HAHAHAHA! your insane in the B-Brain !
Lakim overall, Im super glad that a “light is shining through” <– for some reason, I want you to remember this quoted line.
You'll know why later & I hope when you do, you'll like it. SURPRISE SURPRISE !
I think your sentence, Addib Nafsik is better than I7tirim Nafsik and makes more sense.
But I disagree entirely with the first point because I just don’t think it’s true that the reference to the “self” is always a bad thing. The self is you – good and/or bad. And I read that the reference to alnafs illawama there is considered to mean one of two things: 1) people who do both sins and good deeds 2) people who feel guilty after sinning and that’s a good thing – their conscience is alive. In both cases, it shows that the self – although it is the “being” in you – is not considered always to be a bad thing.
Now one Kuwaiti phrase/word that is perfect for telling someone to behave themselves in a strong straightforward and perfect manner is: I3GUL!!
1001Nights you are missed !
Now, regarding the Nafs. Unfortunately, I have to disagree with you for many reasons:
- ” Al-Nafs Amara bil soo’e” Prophet Mohammed, PBUH. Which means its not you, its yourself.
- There is a verse in QURAN that says something along those lines which means, if you commit a sin then its on your(Self). If you make good deeds, then its for IT <- it refers to the self. NOT you, but your self.
The QURA'AN is an encyclopedia of "Self" references, im sure your aware of that. yet, not once, the self was presented as a good deed doer.
- Tell me something, (this is based on faith), In ramadan, when your fasting, the devil and his gang are tied to the ground and we know that he is the root of all evil yes ?, tell me, how come we still sin ? who made us do that ?
- If your aware enough of the thought process that goes into your brain, you hear a voice in you, judging you, judging others, has negative things to reflect on you, if you sensed it, thats is not you, but yourself. Silence it immediately, its not what you want to hear.
- When somebody advices you they say " gi3day intay bainich o bain nafsich o fakray "
who's you and who's yourself ? ever thought of that ?
Oh and about consciousness, it always comes later right ? why ?. Why cant I stop the whole thing from the beginning and not sin to not feel guilty later ?
Answer: Because "most" people are taken over by their own selves. They need to monitor their thought process and "CATCH" that feeling of anger, regret, fear, when you do, all your life will change.
I hope I clarified my self a bit. no ?
Wulla this is turning into a good philosophical discussion!
Bass baini oo bainik a3tiqid la ana wala inta informed enough on this. But let’s give it a shot anyway.
Ok, as for your statement, “yet, not once, the self was presented as a good deed doer”, sorry Abdullah but this is flat out inaccurate. The Quran actually mentioned different levels of il nafss and the WORST of these levels is the one you mentioned “amara bil soo2”. By the way that’s not hadeeth, it’s from Quran and was mentioned in Surat Yousef. The second level is “alnafs illawama”, which is of course better than the “amara bil soo2” because it requires recognition that you have sinned and it was mentioned it in Surat Alqiyama, and yet another level also mentioned in the Quran and this is a much better level and it’s “alnafs almu6ma2inna” and this nafs was mentioned in Surat Alfajr. So, there is definitely mention of a good nafs – a nafs that had temptations but didn’t succumb to them. It’s your nafs that has instinct and it’s your nafs that you can tame and subdue and its your nafs that goes back to God. Willa 3ayal shil farg baina oo bain ba3ath itha KILINA nfoosna 3ala nama6 waa7id?
Ok. I agree that instinctively we are tempted towards wrongdoings – e.g. your “nafs” makes you want to drink water when you’re fasting in Ramadan. But how you react to the temptation is also a part of your “nafs”. Ya3ni let’s say it’s Ramadan and you and I are both thirsty bass I break my fast and you don’t. This could mean inta nafsik atqa oo a7san min nafsee because it was more capable of resisting instinct.
Moreover if you look at the from Surat Alra3d that says that allah la y’3ayir ma bi qawmin 7ata y’3ayiroo ma bi ANFUSIHUM I think it shows that you have the option of changing what’s inside your nafs. Yes there’s temptation but if your nafs is used to resisting it then it is a good nafs and inshalla tkoon mu6ma2ina at the time of death (inshalla kilina chithee ya rab!) unlike other people’s nafs that was never tamed wala tahathibat.
I love your brain and your references. Ofcourse I thank you for correcting my sources.
check this out ” Moreover if you look at the from Surat Alra3d that says that allah la y’3ayir ma bi qawmin 7ata y’3ayiroo ma bi ANFUSIHUM” see that ? Why did the verse say change yourself first ? Why ? Because it was made as a wild being. As you said, it has to be tamed.
Now, When do they say Nafs mo6ma’ina ? they say it when your “ba3ad 3omer 6owel” dead and gone. Thats the only state.
Yes your right, there are types of nafs, their levels of sin differ.
Please realize that when they refer to nafs 6ayba, it is always associated with al Mo’men (A true believer) you know who’s in that level and what they have to go through to be there, a lot of discipline and self shutting.
About temptation, there is a whole thing/segment/chapter for “Desire” that should not be mixed with the “Self/Nafs” cuz that is an additional volume of needs/greed/sensual/hunger that sometimes might need to be neglected.
I challenge you and any reference in the whole wide world that states ina the Nafs/self is a GOOD being.
Ofcourse, the option is always there, but you have to know how to monitor your brain, your thoughts, decide what you need instead of what you want.
Mashkoor wayed wayed
And thanks for being so open-minded and such a good sport.
But I do feel that you and I may be hitting a wall in the discussion. I could be wrong but I think, due what you said about a “chapter” about Desire, that you’re talking in terms of other religious teachings? I am not well acquainted with Buddhism so I sort of have a different mentality in that sense. I think maybe that’s where we’re hitting a wall. As far as I feel my religion goes, there is no separate chapter that “might need to be neglected”. The way I see it is that in life you’re presented with options, you can opt to give in to wrongdoing, making you one of those guys ili nafsa amara bil soo2, or you can opt to try really hard to avoid wrongdoing and do a lot of good deeds and you would be one of those guys with “nafs mu6ma2ina”. Bass. To me it’s that simple.
Still, I’d like to address some of your points if you’ll bear with me:
Regarding your statement: “Now, When do they say Nafs mo6ma’ina ? they say it when your “ba3ad 3omer 6owel” dead and gone. Thats the only state.”
I’m afraid it’s not true. Nafsi ma tseer mu6ma2inna ILLA itha ana kint zaina gabil il mot willa sh7aga mu6ma2ina? Itha ana 5aayrita nafsi ra7 tkoon moo bass mi5tar3a illa mit9arwi3a marra wa7da!
OO ba3dain there’s no “they say it ba3ad 3omrin 6weel” ya Abdulla makoo a77ad yeg3ad ysolif ma3a rab3a wigool ya jimaa3a tara Bu-Jwaiss ili mat tara nafsa mu6ma2ina Alla yur7uma! 
Ya Abdulla it’s God saying it, it’s an aya in the Quran. Surat Alfajr! 
And regarding this point: “Please realize that when they refer to nafs 6ayba, it is always associated with al Mo’men”
So you’re saying you do believe inna fee nafs mumkin tkoon 6ayba? Shwaya contradiction or maybe I’m misunderstanding?
And finally, and this is the main reason I think we’re hitting a wall, you said this:
“I challenge you and any reference in the whole wide world that states ina the Nafs/self is a GOOD being.”
I already did that, it’s from the Quran in Surat Alfajr. I actually made three different references varying in degrees regarding ilnafs. SOME people’s nafs is good or better than others and some people’s nafs is bad BECAUSE it makes it too easy for its owner to screw up.
Imagine if God created us all with an evil nafs, then how could it be fair for some of us to be sent to hell? It wouldn’t be. We were not created evil. We have a choice of nurturing and guiding ourselves to whatever path we choose. OO bass salamtik hatha ili 3indi!
la7tha intay lazim akhalis min il brain therapy o agra your comment ib ta’anee
Ok , I can see where we are hitting a wall.
first of all, lets separate you from yourself. YOU = GOOD, yourself = NOT.
YOU = controller of yourself if your Mo’men, a true believer.
There is no contradiction with al nafs al mo’6maina, for these reasons:
- Nafs = bad
- because your a mo’men, you controlled/disciplined/tamed it, and made it = GOOD.
- All the verses in Quran when desribing this GOOD state of mind, it is always refering to Mo’men wether its heaven, god’s mercy and angelic/earthly creatures acceptance of you.
- You never find a reference that says AL moslim, its always al mo’men. Its very specific.
I hope this solves the contradiction you got, plus a better view at al nafs.
Regarding your reference to Al-Fajr Aya,
Yes, you described three levels of the self that sins, yes ? Ofcourse we are not the same, thats why we all have different stories, motives and problems given by the ALMIGHTY for us to be tested.
But what is the test ?
Overcoming yourself’s desires, needs and above all, EGO.
Are we there yet ?
p.s: I love how you hinted on Buddhism, I love the belief system but im not a buddhist LOL
i think they say E7TIRIM NAFSIK because if you respect yourself you’ll respect others.
Smurf, thanks for dropping by,
your missing the point
e7tirim nafsek a7sanlek,
respect yourself for ur best
i like that
LOL inta = nasty
The term ‘self’ is used; but they don’t really refer to the self that religion is talking about. The referral is to the person as a whole 3araft?
Ya3ne I respect QWERTY when I refrain from swearing and whatnot. Even if you attack me verbally, I remain respectful. Not for your sake, but because I do not want to observe QWERTY going so low. Yeah?
I think it’s a very sincere concept sara7a, one out of the many ele in the Arab world. It aims at self-regulation.
Poach, you’re being too technical
..
yakereh hal phrase wayed yengal liy when taking exams of stupid professors who admit that they were writing the test while watching the soccer match the day before;p
In my and your defense: KUDOS to you for your detailed technicality.
Just wanted to be the devil’s advocate
Qwerty, I love how your brain works, your in my fav reader’s section now HAH !
Yet, please go through the reply I have to 1001 nights, you might have a different view ?
I get you’re point but I dont agree with you. I think it’s more accurateto say e7terim nafsik.
Im in a rush so Ill pass by to explain later !
btw dino got any new recommended books ? something good to read
Cooookies, where you at ? its been a while !
Before you do the explanation part, read my reply to 1001 nights, then I want to go through your reply
Your juicy reply thats is
on a different note –
I do find myself questioning some of the sayings and how they came about and what’s the best situation for them to be used.
i don’t know that’s just me!
Being different is unique, aint nothing wrong with that
I like the conclusion, you looked at it in a different view, but I think you should face reality just a bit.
Because when you say to someone “adib nafsik/ch”, they’ll probably reply “ana em2adab 5ali9″ or “ahali raboni” which is becoming extremely common these days with the young generation.
But I still like the phrase, makes it much acceptable.
Maryam, im not saying ina golawo this statement 7ag il bashar, LOL
im just saying that verbally, it makes sense, to me at least. I love the part where you mentioned in-directly how “MalaseeeN” i3yal this generation
’3areeba…tawny asaw3eb… lazem as2aaal 3aaanha
F! take your time
No. I wasn’t even talking about that as a contradiction and one of the levels is ilnafs ilmu6ma2inna and makoo separation between you and yourself, you and yourself are one and the same. Makoo a bad you and a good you. There’s just YOU! LOL
Ok 7adda 7adda il discussion going no where.
Yulla kila waa7id we’ll find more fruitful things to discuss in your future posts inshalla.
See ? I knew you didnt believe in the first thing I said.
If you dont separate YOU from YOURSELF, you wont get it. ever.
Oh I definitely agree with you there – I don’t believe in separating me from myself but what’s more important is that it is distinctly clear that we are not created with an evil nafs as far as the Islamic religion is concerned.
I believe that what you were ultimately getting at were the Id and the Ego or perhaps the Ego and the Super-Ego, right? Those were mentioned by Freud structural model of the psyche, not God. My discussion revolved around “alnafs” as far as Islam is concerned.
At any rate, a friend reminded of a couple of ayat that I should have thought of from the beginning, they’re from Surat Alshamss I think and mention nafs wa ma sawaaha fa alhamaha fujooraha wa taqwaaha. So while there is mention of fujoor there is mention of taqwa. So that’s yet another reference directly from the Quran stating that the nafss can be good.
Other religious teachings may view it differently.
I am not refering to anybody but GOD and ISLAM. Freud has nothing to do with this.
I am talking about Al-Nafs. Al-Nafs has different layers, ego is one.
Now back to you,
See that last paragraph ? You just answered yourself. Yes the Quran did mention “Alhamaha fujoorhaa wa taqwaHA” We already agreed that there are different levels of bad deeds/sins/wrong doing (I never mentioned EVIL), we did mention al nafs al lawama.
And that is why I said it needs to be controlled cuz its wild.
I guess the only difference you and I have are the belief systems of separating “You” from “yourself”.
Its a big concept to digest, yet, sit down, think about it, take a breather. You see, if you “GET” this concept, your life will shift.
U5ooy Abdulla, shino “ego” fil Quran? Or better yet, where in the Quran or in hadeeth does it say that there’s you and yourself and that the you is evil and the yourself is good? Please la tiz3al bas I have to beg you to please please reference your mention of anything you say is from Islam because we can’t talk with authority about such important text when we don’t reference it, it just makes others not take us seriously.
Inzain can I ask you for something? You’re very encouraging of the idea of separating you from yourself, right? I think this has nothing to do with religion and more to do with therapy and cognitive behavior and THERE’S NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT bass yarait itsawee post about the mental benefits of separating you from yourself LEAVING RELIGION ENTIRELY OUT OF IT and I think it could make for intriguing discussion. Shgilt?
OK calm down, why do I feel your upset ? LOL
Lemme answer you one by one.
EGO is a new term used. I dont recall the Aya exactlly, but it refers back to the msg that the ALMIGHTY sent to his messenger Mohammed (PBUH) when he went a little angry on an OLD fellow once and the aya is said along these lines ” wala takon ghaleethan fa yanfathawo il naas min 7awlik ” It is refering ofcourse to his EGO/SELF being impatient. So he was asked to be more patient and hold a long breath. YES ?
EGO is the new terminology for SELF/NAFS.
Let me give you a modern example, One reader once told me im a jerk for something I didnt do (lol).
What would happen here ? If we speak frankly, I would say, my ego got hurt cuz somebody tried to step on it. In my case, it didnt, cuz the first thing that came to my mind was, does he/she know me to begin with ? why would i be offended ? LOL, so I let it slip by “choice”. Since il nafs amara bil soo’a, then I would have let my tongue do the job and made him regret the day he lived yes ? But m not like that, thats not me now. Thats the old ME. The untamed me.
Oh and about the last part you mentioned, I would very much love to do so. I have adapted this meditation process 2 years ago, I have many stories to tell and alot of things that I hope would benefit you and the readers too. I would very much love that.
If only most people were discussing things like we do, you know, being civilized and all, ohh, that would be great !
Oh no I’m sorry I gave that impression, I’m not upset! Aslan you’re too nice and mujaamil for me to be upset!
And more importantly, the aya you spoke is from surat Al3mraan, aya 159 and its wa law kunta fathan ’3aleeth alqawl lanfadhoo min 7awlik.
Love that aya!
Please don’t think I’m upset. I disagree with your approach YES, but I still think you’re clearly a very nice person. It’s just that I love to see humility in people and I value people who say things like “Im not sure” and “I don’t know” and “I have to check because I could be mistaken”. I love to see people who as they grow older and read more realize that there’s SO MUCH more that they don’t know.
You know why? Because it’s dangerous, very dangerous for us to put words in Islam’s mouth. I can say I believe this or that but if I say Islam believes this and that shouldn’t I at least check or give reference? If I say something is from the Quran shouldn’t I make some effort to find out which aya or how the aya was said especially with how easy it is now to find these things in the internet?
Zaat is all!
Oo zain swait 7agarta laish tig3ad italasan bil blog jidam Allah o 5alga with some guy that doesn’t even matter just delete oo 5ala iywalli.
Oh thanks, thats great !
“It’s just that I love to see humility in people and I value people who say things like “Im not sure” and “I don’t know” and “I have to check because I could be mistaken”. I love to see people who as they grow older and read more realize that there’s SO MUCH more that they don’t know.” < -- im sorry but how is this relevant to what we said ?
“You know why? Because it’s dangerous, very dangerous for us to put words in Islam’s mouth. I can say I believe this or that but if I say Islam believes this and that shouldn’t I at least check or give reference? If I say something is from the Quran shouldn’t I make some effort to find out which aya or how the aya was said especially with how easy it is now to find these things in the internet?” <- i did say/mention that what I quoted is not the same as the Quran, thats one, the other reason is I dont have arabic so I have to translate. ANother point, im talking to you, a kuwaiti muslim, so I assume you’d get it almost immediately and not analyze how I import my info.
You’re right it’s not directly relevant. I7na tasha3abna wayed in this conversation. I recalled the concept of humility because the effort to search and reference shows humility. But yeah that doesn’t have to do with the “you”, “yourself”, “nafs” issue 9a7 kalamik. As for the aya you’ll have to pardon me for being so detailed. I did understand what you meant when you mentioned the aya bass al7een 3al aqal you know which sura it came from in case you wanted to use it in the future and someone asked you.
oh pardon me it’s ’3aleeth ilqalb not ’3aleeth il qawl. How come your blog ma ybayyin any Arabic it can make things so much easier when quoting the Quran!
this is getting interesting