Phenomenon: Self-Neglect
(UPDATE) Based on popular demand, I decided to put this post as a sticky, at least till the end of the day. Enjoy it !
I’v always wanted to throw a bundle of spotlights on this issue. Self-neglect, self-abandonment, self-denial, forgetting/ignoring ,on purpose, your needs. Yet, Easily squeeze everything in for your partner, lover, friend, family, freak, whoever.
I happen to have many friends from different ages. Various levels of insane hormones jumping everywhere from the lovely teen friends of mine, up to the 30′s mark. I tend to get down with the married couples, boy/girl friend, the confused and the self obsessed.
I have witnessed many scenarios that involve, he/she does not treat me right. I do not get enough time. My boss does not see my potentials. Im the last on the list. As cold as it may sound. I couldent care less. Why ? Because you my dear have neglected yourself. Your needs. Built your whole life thinking that “this man/woman will complete me”. This piece of nonsense should be thrown for the ill and weak minded. Waiting for someone to complete you ? what are you a LEGO game ?
I do not blame, point the finger at anyone. What you can do my dear is take that finger of yours and point it at yourself.
Imagine yourself as an early seeded plant. Why would I look at you ? My dear your not even above the ground surface yet, your practically, invisible. Get it ? Let me get a bit mystical on you:
This seed will grow in time. It needs water, soil, and sunlight. Now this seed will grow into a green plant, slowly, yet surely growing, more n more, with time, till it reaches the climax. A fully blossomed flower right ?
Only then will you be grown enough for me to look at you. You attract me. You took care of yourself, all by yourself. Even the chlorophyl, which is the essential element in a plant’s growth COMES FROM WITH IN !
So based on that, imagine if you could cater to yourself, take good care of yourself, love, appreciate, respect and discipline that self of yours. Start doing the smallest things like, treating yourself for something special, going to the gym, have a massage, spend some money on you, create your own bubble bath, indulge yourself with something you like, have a silent moment, enjoy chocolate, pray, meditate, relax, have a guilt free brain cell that generates positivity all day long. In other words, having a smooth four season’s hotel like Glass, fill it with crystal clean water till it tops up, wouldent that be something you want to grab ? even if your full ?
For those who still do not get it yet, i’ll say it clean and simple. You will not complain from ANYTHING in your life ever again if you put yourself first in your list. Not in a relationship, not at work not never.
You know, this blog of mine is a judgment, drama, Melo-drama, Kuwaiti ramdan TV series mess FREE. Its all about those good good vibrations. Yet, I always find myself going soft and tender on women. I get repeated responses from them all the time, they “Love” to fall victim in a relationship. Love to point the finger, end up with ” but i love him you know ? “ No babe I dont know what non-sense mess your brain is giving. He is not the source of your madness. You are. You give others and dont give yourselves nothing. So whenever anything goes wrong, your brain will tell you ” ohhhhh well, that damn son of Gmaasha, i gave him this, that, this and even that … hmmm ,, this is how he repays me ? “
My dear, repay you ? If you love him you should wait for nothing in return. Ask yourself things like this instead of pointing the finger ” what did I give myself ? did I give myself a glimpse of what I gave him ? “ the answer is no.
Please understand that you do not need to be pressured to like someone, let go, let things come easily, go with the flow, do not expect anything. Some people take alot of time to come out of their shell, when they do, they wont stop giving.
Switching the spotlight on Boys now. They too are fragile, but they wouldn’t tell you. They have fears, insecurities, yes there on the thighs, the lousy abdominal and chest area, yes they fear you and the society, who are we fooling ? Yes, They talk about you all the time. With themselves. with me. They are more dramatic than you by the way.
They understand what you want completely, they have mothers after all, but, a man’s brain is more scientific/mathematic and straight to the point. The guy would robotically say ” maybe she wants that new bag she’s been hinting about “ so he goes, buys, wraps, brings. You cry ! why ? This is not what you want. You want to spend time with him, you dont want the bag (material things), you want him. For some reason, you think that he must “get” your indirect signals and understand you, as if you come with an owner’s manual . How old are you ? stop playing games and talk to the man. Tell him verbally what you want. He will comply. The shorter, the better.
When my guy friends throw their lovely drama at me, I always ask this question ” so, how do you spend your day ? “. Please do not tell me your waiting for an answer, you know what the lousy answer is, so no i wont go there. You too might sleep, eat and do nothing.
Ironically, I find teeny relationships more adorable. For simple reasons, innocence & uncertainty.
CONCLUSION
What is today ? monday ? monday ? oh friday ?? that fast ? Time passes by so quickly now. How many years have you suffered there ? down there in that deep deep place in your brain where you let no one in. Nothing is worth anything but you. Blame no one but you.
Fill your life with whatever it is you want, throw yourself all the way to the front of your list, spend some money on yourself, give money to others, bring joy to you, fill your glass to the fullest, you’ll be known then as a giver. When you give, you’ll receive without even the “need” to receive, your full already.
Please enjoy whatever comes your way, make everyday worth living for. Smile. Smile alot, it melts the tension.
Related posts:
beautiful post abdullah…
simply beautiful =)
What a lovely post
Thank you! :***
yes yes guilty off all that,but u know i am learning, the hard way i know, but its still good
One of your best posts ever .. absolutely true & beautiful !
Thank you !
beautiful post, thanks
Eye opening post…keep up the good work..
i vote this post to be your #1
excellently written.. mashallah you are an eloquent writer
thank you for this lovely post…you gave high morals now
It’s one of the best posts ever!
I wish that every reader implement this great lesson in his / her life!
Thanks Abdulla
the man/woman will complete me concept is not true
You complete yourself on your own
through taking care of yourself.. achieving your goals and enjoying
life at every second of it.
I believe that instead of thinking you need a man/woman to complete
you.. Think of Sharing your happiness,goals and achievements
with someone.
right now i’m takin care of myself.. getting my ultimate pleasures
through work satisfaction.. beauty care.. travelling hanging out with
friends. and life can’t get any better than this. and No Man/Woman do u need
to help you in doing that. you can do it on your own and Be happy to the extreme
That special someone i’m sure all of us think of once in awhile or all the time
will come along in the way.. just no need to force it
Like Abdullah Said Put yourself First. its the best feeling ever
dnt worry about ur boss.. who you gonna fall for. and don’t put too much
focus on other peoples problems that are unneccesary.. u;ll grow white hair
before u know it
live your life with abundance.. pleasure and extreme self satisfaction
in modesty and bliss and harmony
its the best feeling u can ever get
Excellent writing Abdullah.. you have my Admiration
and Respect
Wise Intellegent and Truthful to every letter
hmmmm, its like ABC of relationships. I think you were a fair judge for both genders. Your advice was logical, strightforward yet very true
Hope its an eye opener for those who live in laalaa land and loves to create drama.
I truely belive that its we who decide wheather or not to enjoy each day. I also think that no one loves a week person and those who are fully incharge of themselves are more attaractive.
Amazing! True 100%
Please if there is a book nafs kalamik tell me!
P.S. Always always always admires ur posts/thoughts/paths/people u like/etc …and many
Self pity is such a turn off..
Abdullah, im speechless.
THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!
its all i can say… very very well written.
i have a suggestion for you, think about writing in magazines here, spread these very wisely written masterpieces, we need more positive minds in our society Abdullah. You for sure will make that happen.
Thank you once again..!
Simply … A Wonderful post
the way u write is amazing
(: all the best
you made my day
thank you 
3bdallah well ur post is like a “wake up call!!” a kick in the mental backside!! it is true loveable and readable .. thank u sooooo much 3bdallah u r simply the BEST ..
Nouf, im super glad you liked it, enjoy it ;*
i totally agree about loving urself and pampering urself in every way after all no one can do it better !
yet still if someone did it for u u would enjoy it more !
hmm i like what u said but u made needing someone sound bad !
its not ! we need all the people we love not one boy/girl friend nooo but every one i love !
u know the experiment done on water the guy who says good stuff to the water freez it and then the water would be shaped in anice way !
akeed el ensan akthar makhlooq 7asas soo its not only natural that we netathar but nice !!!
its nice that asmile from the door man would make ur morning happier !!!
it nice that it matters although u donot really know the door man and its ugly that u donot know him and u pass by him and say good morning every day !!!
its hard for girls to tell guys what the want if she says she wants the bag he ill go oh she is using me if she says i want ur time he ill go ooh then as we get closer i donot have time for myself !!!!!
its all messed up !!!!!!!
yeah and y does the plant need to been a plant for us to see it !!!!!!
y dont we help it grow !! by loving it !!!
akeed this way it will grow faster !
and it will grow with love !!!
love is not afavor ! that we r doing to people !
or things its ne3ma men alla !!!
7emdella enee aqder wogood my friend 3ashan agdar akooon happy ma3a !
7emdella ene a7eb el coffee this much and i know enee a7ebhaa 3ashan i enjoy it !
Nice Post ! Makes Me Think for a while ! ;p which also makes me think ina ely bel 9oura wajaah mashakel in cleaning up his nails !
BRAVOO ! ;p
Chill Out ppl !
wow man, lovely post,
can i share it, while giving credits to you offcourse?!
thanks abdullah
hopefully there’ll be more to come
a round of applause to YOU!!!!
one of the best posts ever!! walla madri ay post is the best!!
mashallah,,,you really outdid yourself 3la hal amazing post
CONCLUSION
What is today ? monday ? monday ? oh friday ?? that fast ? Time passes by so quickly now. How many years have you suffered there ? down there in that deep deep place in your brain where you let no one in. Nothing is worth anything but you. Blame no one but you.
Fill your life with whatever it is you want, throw yourself all the way to the front of your list, spend some money on yourself, give money to others, bring joy to you, fill your glass to the fullest, you’ll be known then as a giver. When you give, you’ll receive without even the “need” to receive, your full already.
Please enjoy whatever comes your way, make everyday worth living for. Smile. Smile alot, it melts the tension.
simply beautiful and so true. live like its the last day in your life. thats what i do and thats what keeps the smile on my face all the time. always ask my friends to try new things, and never regret any failing experience, you just have to learn from it.
again i can only applause you for the great post 3beed <3
Great post abdullah,, i luv it!
This all seems to familiar
Wow mashalla… beautifully written!
It made me think things through thank you!
Nice post .. sej shwaya 6ewela bas worth reading
Bas sometimes u have to blame others
Bas sometimes ;X
“The shorter, the better”
I saw the small plant picture before 2days unwanting to read the post and read the title only (makan li khilg KILISH)
BUT now (lama qarart agra) its the fourth time i read this post!! I LOVE. IM AMAZED. ASTONISHING.
THANK U ABDULLAH,my friend, and our blossomed flower ;D
ya7laaailik wallah, 6ala3 3ayal shabab ilkwaitiyeen fe menhooom foud/mo5/ibdaa3/tafkeeer
wayed 3ejabny ur post! keep it up!
wow… mashalla u really have a way of writing.. u got me v interested to read it till the end.. keep it up i love ur blog
Oh thank god for this post!! Whenever I talk to girls it’s all about guys guys guys! And when I say oh ignore, why want a man in ur life? Just wait for the perfect timing, uhwa byeelich… tg3ad i6ale3li alf 3ther! God just have fun.. I really loved the post, I hope I don’t turn into these type of people;p Infact I have to spoil my self once a month haha! If not more
I want to add one more thing:
??? ???? ???? ????? ???? ??? ??????? ???????? ??? ???? ??? ???? ???? ????? ????? ??? ?????? ?? ??? ?? ??? ??? ??? ????? ????? ????? ????? ????? ?? ????? ?????? ????? ????? ?????.
?? ????? ??????? ?.??????
[...] Tags: Breakup Rehab, How To, List, Nasty, Personal, Relationships, Steps A post at Abdullah’s p0ach inspired me to write this post. I saw some “steps to get over her/him” in a magazine, [...]
Thank you dandoon, im really glad you liked it.
Im super glad you liked it !
You my dear deserve a rest, a breather for sure. You know what I mean ;*
awwww, we are humbled
Thank you !
Anything for deema
Hey Neil, thanks for dropping by
Glad you liked it !
WOOH ! #1 ? and an eloquent writer ? gosh this is way beyond what i expected, thank you and im really glad you received it well
THANK YOU !
Always a pleasure to have people receive something you do so well.
THANKS & i have the same hopes as you.
Hey there Free !
Thanks for dropping by & for your very kind words, I take that to heart honestly.
What you mentioned has my full approval for sure. Seems to me that you know the “trick” by now. Excellent analysis, bright mind indeed.
More power to you !
I know dasha 3ar’6 !
bs ur replay is like wow !
I really like the way you think !
Absolutely true, those who find what they want from within are more attractive. They know what they want. You want to be near that energy.
Also, Im so glad you found this fair for both sides. I try to squeeze out whats on my mind the best way i know how
Fajer, thank you very much, im so glad you found my crazy ramblings beneficial for you.
I tend to read many different books but Mr. Eckhart Tolle is the guy i always follow. Read these two titles ” A New Earth ” & “The Power Of Now”
Umm hmm, AGREED !
Thank You….I am very glad to find people with such emotional intellegence. with broad thinking and such incredible observation of human behavior in our society.
Great Minds Exist in Kuwait.. and u are for sure one of them:P
Thats a huge huge compliment, thank you very much.
I guess its all about meshing up with everybody from different ages, things get revealed, repeatedly.
Im glad that my reader’s base is getting bigger every day, various levels of intelligence. I could not be happier.
Thank you
Shall be looking forward to your next Blog…
and don’t take it as a Compliment.. You have Potential.. your analysis.. articulation and in depth thinking is obviously sincerely intellectually stimulating..clearly
WEll Done
I take it all to heart, THANK YOU!
Hey There N !
Thanks for dropping by & for the compliments.
I will consider your suggestion for sure. Im glad you found the positive vibe out of this, glad you liked the whole thing too by the way.
ilNoone THANK YOU VERY VERY VERY MUCH !
Hey there, glad you liked it
point taken.
shako it grows asraaa3 itha 7abaina akthar!!
DISAGREE
LOOOL
HAH! sij ibnaya
your focus was on the nails? Thats so cute 
Im glad you liked the post by the way.
Girl.. I agree with ya.. it is definitely more fun when someone does it for ya
… You don’t have to let someone do things for ya.. You want to let them do it for you… 
an understanding a connection where there are no insecurities
to share and care…am i making any sense at all?
Hey there Fady !
Thanks for dropping by !
please consider the whole thing yours, do with it whatever you want to do.
just spread the word
I double free.
Thanks Abdullah…
So i am making sense
.. Grazzi Abdullah
Ofcourse u are
most definitely !
Ofcourse your referring to Free right ?
Yes !
Isint she something else ? Glad to have both of u in my space
Why Thank you kuwaitiya
I enjoy wowing people .. it gives me pleasure and always makes me smile
Allah.. positive energy is flowing in.. when someone says :
“isn’t she something else”
a7rajtni..
..
many thanks Abdullah
np my dear
I enjoy reading interesting thoughts of ppl
she is !!
HAH! laaa ishda3wa, you deserve it !
a highly appreciate it and humbly accept your words
thank you ildileeee
Glad you liked it 
AWWWW thanks .. Im soooooo glad you liked it ;*
THANK YOU DELLY ! Glad you liked it !
doesn’t it now ?
Hey there May,
Thanks for dropping by !
Im super glad you liked it, more power to you !
Point taken
Motashakir ya baiih
Ashkorich f
Hey there Hessa !
Thanks for dropping by ! Im so glad you like the post !
Your more than welcome to stay here as much as you want
a3fowik
Queen Bee ! Thanks for dropping by !
Im super glad you liked it !
Spoil yourself girl, more more and more
I loved it!
I wish we had more Abdullahs in our world w inkoun ib khair!
This is definitely added to one of my favorite quotes
Allah yir7imah
He was an outstanding Public Figure
WAWO ! THANK YOU FOR SHARING !
Aww, thank you, im glad you liked the post !